In Eden, God established the perfect family structure, though the Fall has since distorted it. As Christian parents, we are called to raise children who honor God in a world that increasingly rejects Him.
The challenge is immense, as biblical values are often mocked today. Yet, Scripture assures us: “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). This is a divine blueprint for nurturing children who stand firm in the face of cultural challenges.
Understanding “Honor” in Biblical Context
Before discussing how to raise children who honor God, we must understand what “honor” means biblically. The Hebrew word for honor, kabod, carries the weight of “glory” and “heaviness.” It implies giving proper weight or significance to something—acknowledging its true value.
To honor God means recognizing His supreme worth, submitting to His authority, and reflecting His character in our lives. When our children honor God, they aren’t merely adhering to a set of rules; they’re acknowledging His rightful place as Lord over their lives.
The Fifth Commandment explicitly connects family dynamics with divine honor: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12). This commandment establishes a crucial pattern: children who learn to honor God-ordained authority in the home are better equipped to honor God Himself.
Many parents have found The Age of Opportunity: A Biblical Guide to Parenting Teens by Paul David Tripp invaluable for understanding how to communicate these biblical principles of honor to adolescents. Tripp masterfully connects the concept of honor to everyday parent-teen interactions, providing practical guidance for navigating these crucial years with biblical wisdom rather than worldly compromise.
The Heart of the Matter: Beyond Behavior Modification
Many parents mistakenly focus exclusively on their children’s external behavior. While behavior matters, Scripture directs our attention deeper: “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:23).
Our children’s outward actions flow from their inward beliefs. Behavior modification might produce temporary compliance, but heart transformation produces lasting character. As parents, we must aim beyond raising well-behaved children to raising God-honoring children—a distinction that makes all the difference.
Consider King David’s prayer after his moral failure: “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10). David understood that right actions flow from a right heart. Similarly, our parenting must address the heart, not just the hands.
The Four Pillars of Raising God-Honoring Children
1. Model What You Teach
Children learn more from what we do than what we say. If we want them to honor God, we must honor Him first.
I still remember counseling a father whose teenage son had abandoned his faith. Through tears, he asked where he had gone wrong. As we talked, a pattern emerged: while he had faithfully taken his son to church, his weekday life reflected different priorities. His son had simply followed the implicit rather than explicit curriculum of his home.
Scripture warns: “You then who teach others, do you not teach yourself?” (Romans 2:21). Our children are watching us, learning from our responses to difficulty, our treatment of others, our digital habits, and our priorities regarding time and money.
Ask yourself hard questions: Do my children see me prioritizing my relationship with God? Do they witness me serving others sacrificially? Do they observe me confessing sin and seeking forgiveness?
Remember: we cannot impart what we do not possess. Our children need to see authentic faith lived out, not perfect performance.
2. Immerse Them in God’s Word
In Deuteronomy 6:6-9, God commands parents:
“And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”
This passage reveals that Scripture should permeate every aspect of family life—not just formal teaching times. While family devotions are valuable, biblical instruction should be woven into everyday conversations and experiences.
When your child marvels at a sunset, point to the Creator’s handiwork. When conflicts arise between siblings, guide them to biblical principles of forgiveness. When current events dismay them, direct them to God’s sovereignty and unchanging character.
For families with younger children, The Jesus Storybook Bible: Every Story Whispers His Name by Sally Lloyd-Jones has become a treasured resource in countless Christian homes. What sets this children’s Bible apart is how it connects every story to Jesus, helping children see God’s redemptive plan unfolding throughout Scripture. The beautiful illustrations captivate young minds while the thoughtful text plants seeds of theological understanding that will grow as they mature.
Digital Bible apps, age-appropriate devotionals, Scripture memory games, and audio Bibles can all help immerse children in God’s Word. But nothing replaces a parent who naturally connects Scripture to life’s moments, showing children that God’s Word speaks to every situation.
3. Cultivate Spiritual Disciplines
Just as we teach our children physical disciplines like brushing teeth and eating vegetables, we must intentionally cultivate spiritual disciplines in their lives. Prayer, Bible reading, worship, service, and fellowship aren’t optional extras but essential habits for spiritual growth.
Begin with age-appropriate practices. Even toddlers can fold hands for prayer and learn simple Scripture verses. Elementary children can begin personal devotions with guidance. Teenagers can tackle deeper study and more mature service opportunities.
A mother in our church created a simple “spiritual growth chart” for her children, marking not their physical height but their growing spiritual maturity. She celebrated when her son first prayed aloud in family devotions, when her daughter memorized her first Psalm, when either showed evidence of applying Scripture to a decision. This visual reminder helped her children see spiritual growth as a dynamic, ongoing process.
Remember: the goal isn’t religious performance but genuine connection with God. Avoid making spiritual disciplines burdensome tasks to check off; instead, present them as precious opportunities to know God better.
4. Create a Grace-Filled Environment
Perhaps counterintuitively, a home where children learn to honor God must be filled with grace. Why? Because without experiencing grace, children may associate God with harsh judgment rather than loving redemption.
When our children fail (and they will), they need to experience both accountability and forgiveness—just as God offers us. They need to hear regularly: “There’s nothing you could do that would make me love you more, and nothing you could do that would make me love you less.”
In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul warns: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Heavy-handed, legalistic parenting that emphasizes rules over relationship often produces either rebels or Pharisees—neither of whom truly honor God.
Instead, our discipline should reflect God’s character—firm but loving, consistent but merciful, always aimed at restoration rather than punishment. When we model both justice and mercy, our children glimpse the heart of God.
Navigating Today’s Cultural Challenges
Raising God-honoring children has never been easy, but today’s challenges are distinct. Digital technology, moral relativism, and a culture increasingly hostile to biblical values create a parenting landscape our grandparents never navigated.
Digital Discipleship
The average American child now spends more than seven hours daily on electronic devices. These digital environments shape our children’s worldviews, often subtly undermining biblical values.
Rather than simply restricting access, wise parents practice “digital discipleship”—teaching children to evaluate media through a biblical lens. Watch shows together and discuss the messages being conveyed. Talk about social media posts that contradict Scripture. Help them develop biblical critical thinking skills that will serve them long after parental controls expire.
For parents concerned about navigating the digital landscape with wisdom, The Tech-Wise Family: Everyday Steps for Putting Technology in Its Proper Place by Andy Crouch offers practical strategies for creating healthy boundaries around technology without demonizing it. Unlike many books that merely highlight the dangers of technology, Crouch provides a constructive vision for how technology can be used wisely within a Christ-centered family culture.
Consider implementing technology sabbaths—regular times when the whole family unplugs to focus on face-to-face relationships and spiritual renewal. These breaks remind children that while technology is useful, it shouldn’t control us.
Preparing for Opposition
Jesus promised His followers would face opposition: “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you” (John 15:18). As our culture grows increasingly post-Christian, our children will likely face ridicule for their faith.
We must prepare them for this reality, not shield them from it. Share age-appropriate examples of believers facing opposition, both from Scripture and church history. Role-play potential scenarios they might encounter. Assure them that God’s approval matters infinitely more than peer acceptance.
A father I know regularly asks his children at dinner: “Did you face any challenges to your faith today?” This simple question opens conversations about navigating a world that often rejects biblical truth. It also communicates his expectation that faith will be tested—and his confidence that they can stand firm.
The Ultimate Goal: Kingdom-Minded Children
As Christian parents, our ultimate goal isn’t raising successful, happy, or even “good” children in the world’s eyes. Our aim is to raise kingdom-minded children who view their lives as part of God’s redemptive story.
Kingdom-minded children understand that they exist for God’s glory, not their own comfort or achievement. They recognize their talents, education, and opportunities as resources to advance God’s kingdom, not their personal kingdoms.
This perspective transforms everything—career choices, relationship decisions, financial priorities. Rather than asking, “What will make me happy?” kingdom-minded children ask, “How can my life contribute to God’s purposes?”
We cultivate this mindset by regularly exposing our children to missions, serving the marginalized together, and discussing current events through the lens of God’s kingdom advancing. We help them see themselves not as the center of their own stories but as characters in God’s greater narrative.
Trusting God’s Sovereignty
Even as we implement these biblical principles, we must recognize our limitations. We cannot control our children’s spiritual destiny. Each child must ultimately make their own choice to honor God or reject Him.
This reality should drive us to our knees. Prayer acknowledges that while we have tremendous influence, only God can transform our children’s hearts. Through prayer, we express both our responsibility and our dependence.
Remember Proverbs 22:6 offers a principle, not a guarantee. Some children raised in godly homes still walk away from faith. Others raised in spiritually barren environments become mighty servants of God. These exceptions remind us of God’s sovereignty—and should prompt humility in our parenting.
If your child is currently walking away from faith, don’t despair. The biblical record includes numerous prodigals who later returned. Keep praying, keep loving, keep modeling authentic faith. God’s arm is not too short to save.
Conclusion: The Fruit That Remains
Jesus told His disciples: “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should remain” (John 15:16). As parents, we long to see our children bear fruit that remains—evidence of genuine faith that endures long after they leave our homes.
The heartbeat of Christian parenting is raising children who honor God not because they must, but because they love Him. When we point our children to the beauty and worth of Christ, we prepare them to stand firm in a world that seeks to pull them away.
Though we no longer dwell in Eden’s perfection, we can still participate in God’s redemptive work by raising children who hear and respond to those divine echoes. May the fruit of your parenting bring glory to God for generations to come.
